Lessons

Our bodies have taken a little while to get used to the time difference as well as to the lack of schedule, so we had another slow morning to rest and spend time in quiet…something we don’t do enough of in our normal lives, and a discipline we are learning about.

Fortunately, we did connect up again with Ricky and Derek and found out that it would be great if we could help out with the final day in a local kids’ program, sort of like a safe option for kids after school. Ricky’s wife, Minty, works with these kids throughout the year. I think I anticipated a Vacation Bible School type of environment in a local church. Instead, we ended up helping with final preparations for a Christmas program for kids of one of the local townships, Hout Bay. A lot of the townships have been relegated to locations on the outskirts of the city. Hout Bay is interesting, however, because it has grown up out of nothing right next to a very affluent part of the city. Literally, one side of the road has all gated homes, the other side is lean-to’s and shacks. Stark. The township there is considered “informal” in that the government did not allot the land for the specific purpose of a township, rather the township grew in response to a few factors: Land was available to be taken, it is proximate to Cape Town (jobs), there is a good fishing bay nearby, the affluent residents of the area are more “liberal” and didn’t kick the settlers out right away, etc, etc. But, because it is not a sanctioned neighborhood, many of the local services don’t really cover the township (e.g. fire trucks, electricity). So, if you have a fire, you are at the mercy of the goodness of local firefighters and if you want electricity, you steal it.

On the side of the hill in the midst of the township, there is a little place of safety that has been built for kids with a shipping container used for a classroom and supply closet, a little play structure, a garden, and a variety of small toys and games for the kids. But mind you, it is still a township. The kids are running around barefoot in the dirt with bits of glass and garbage on the ground. Yet, it was beautiful, and a haven from its surroundings. These kids were there to be kids and to be loved and there were trees to shade the area and people there to try to love them. We were treated as quite the guests when we got out of our car with the kids running up to introduce themselves. I ended up with many of the girls petting my hair because it was so light and soft. I was overcome with these kids who so needed to be loved. Yet, it was hard to know how best to love them.

Andy and I chipped into the program of the day with a very small lunch being served and then the kids being split up into groups for activities. Our first assignment was to help a group of the kids in making a craft. At one point, we had more than a dozen kids yelling for glue, glitter, stickers and help and I was trying to teach the lesson of sharing. I was quickly told by the woman that runs the place that “These kids don’t know how to share. You must allocate.” It seemed quite a stark lesson in the moment. They do not get much in their lives, so even sharing the whole sheet of stickers seems like a sacrifice that they are not willing to make. And, according to the woman in charge, it is a lesson totally lost on the children because it does not match up with what they experience in the rest of their lives. It was a sad concept for us to learn. Sharing is not a basic value for all children in the world. It is learned after first learning that your needs will be met.

In the evening, the parents were invited to come to share some food and see the kids’ play of the Christmas story that Minty had ever-so-patiently been working on with them. So, we spent most of the afternoon observing and helping out where we could and then stayed to watch the program and welcome the parents. Only one father showed up to watch. The rest of the attendees were mothers and grandmothers. This is an epidemic here, not unlike a lot of places in the U.S. Children grow up without fathers – sometimes mothers – who are part of their lives and they seek protection, acceptance, and identity in things like unhealthy relationships, gangs, etc.

It was an emotional day that I believe we are still processing in our minds and together. We continue to think and pray: “What is South Africa teaching us?” I believe we are seeing and learning many things.

A fun side note in our day is that we got to help decorate a Christmas tree. Cathy Cordle, our gracious hostess, had mentioned the idea to us and we loved the prospect of being able to help out and enjoy a bit of the Christmas spirit. It was a great way to enjoy her company and feel as if we were contributing to the celebration of the season in some way. We had a great time and the tree turned out wonderfully.